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2 April

Spence posted a new feature, the Davidson Classifieds:

Just plain TIRED after a long day at the office? Call "DancinFingers" Bruce for professional massage therapy. Bruce is having an OCEAN EXPLORER special this month, to sooth your aching "winch wrist", "NOMAD neck", and "diesel disc", or for a chassis alignment. $15/15 minutes or $300/300 minutes. By appointment only.

Cribbage Lessons at sea? Email guido@sanquentinfederalprison.com.

Depressed? Lonely? Jump from the stern. Be careful not to hurt yourself on the tow wire.

Men's hairstyling: Sue's Doos. Flat rate: $300 (crossed out) M&M's. Saturday's at 10.

Wanted: Good, clean rags. Inquire at Wet Lab.

NOTICE: Boat runs ashore are cancelled until morale improves. That goes for Payday as well. The Captain.

FOR SALE. Used Fishing pole. See Paul.

Hot Offer from The Galley: Show 'n Tell. This week Scotty features Mum's very own homemade bread recipe requiring no measuring. And if that wasn't enough, then the secret of Mrs. Swistchew's Scottish Sushi, Scottish Pizza, or Scottish Chinese cannot be far behind.

Winch and Gyro Repair Service. Shawn, Talkie channel 1.